25 Jul 2013

Tuesday, July 25th

 Warning: Language and drug references.

Daddy picked me up at 10am yesterday. He drove me out to the fields where he works, and let me play with the chickens! Chickens are my favorite animal, I love going there in the spring when there's loads of baby chicks to play with.

After that, we went to the beachside pool. I remember daddy teaching me to swim, and he kept saying he couldn't believe how grown up I was and how good I'd got at swimming. He used to take me to the pool every Saturday, but I started going with my friends instead when I was ten, so he's not seen me in the pool for a while. After a few hours he told me he had something to tell me, and got out before helping me out (the ladder broke a few years ago. The owner had it removed because of health and safety, but hasn't got round to putting a new one in)

He sat down on one of the loungers, and I kneeled on the foot-rest. He told me that he'd got a new job. In Bridgeport. He said he would be moving there in September. I just stared at him for a while, I didn't know what to say!

"What about me?" Was all I could finally come up with. I could see hearing me say that hurt him, and I could see tears starting in his eyes, but I felt the same way so why shouldn't he?
"You can come and visit me all the time, honey. And I'll still come here and see you when I can, I'll stay with Auntie Lynn. I'll still be there for Christmas at Gramma's." I was silent again for a bit. Christmas at Gramma's was tradition. Every year we all go and squeeze into her little townhouse in Bridgeport for a week. Will my Mum be going this year?
"I'll miss you." I said, trying to hold back tears so I could be strong for my Daddy. I know he wouldn't do this if he didn't have to.

He picked me up and swung me around infront of him, before kneeling on the floor and pulling me close for a tight hug.
"I'll miss you more than you could ever imagine." He said while he kissed my hair and rubbed his hand on my back. "Your Mummy will still be here, and you can phone me up any time and I'll answer. I know these past few weeks have been hard for you, but we can get through this. I love you more than anything, and if you miss me too much I'll move back."
"Why don't you just stay?" I asked.
"April, I'm sorry. Let's try this for a few months. If it doesn't work out by Christmas, I'll move back. I promise." He kissed me again, and I hugged him a little tighter.

We didn't do much else after that. He took me to have lunch and an ice-cream, but it didn't cheer me up much. When we got home, I went straight to my room, and I heard him telling Mummy about it downstairs. She didn't shout or anything, but when he left she came straight upstairs and hugged me while I cried on my bed.

I texted Justin when I first woke up today. Lottie had some horse-riding lessons, and I really needed to get out of the house and talk to someone. He'd replied by the time I was back up from breakfast and a shower, and we met up in the town by the hospital.

He asked me what was wrong straight away, but I didn't want to talk just yet. We walked out of the town centre, through the fields and up the hills before we sat down and I finally felt like talking.

 We sat in a patch of tall flowers under the shade of a willow tree for hours. He barely said a word, and let me say everything that was on my mind. He's a really good listener. I told him all about yesterday with my Daddy, what we usually do at Christmas, how much I missed spending time with him, which I hadn't even realised until yesterday. He asked a few questions, and when I started to cry he'd either move closer and put and arm around me, or just stroke my arm to make me feel better. When I'd been silent for a few minutes, he leaned in, put a hand on my shoulder, and whispered in my ear: "Tag, you're it" before jumping up and running off.

I couldn't help but laugh as I watched him run off, looking over his shoulder with a cheeky grin on his face. I managed to get up and chase after him, though, I think he let me catch him.

We played tag for a while, it must've been about half an hour or so. Until I hurt my ankle. I was 'it' and was just catching up to him when I felt it twist on itself. I grabbed his arm for support.

"What's wrong?" He asked. He looked really worried. I didn't reply for a minute, I was trying not to cry. I didn't want him to think I was a baby, which is silly, because I was crying infront of him not much earlier.
"I think I broke my ankle." I replied after a bit.
"Broke it?" He raised his eyebrow and did a little half-smile. "April, if you broke it you'd be screaming on the floor."
"How do you know? Maybe I'm really good with pain?" I sort-of snapped at him, which I felt bad about. "I don't think I can walk." I said more calmly.
"Well, it's a long way home, and I don't think you can fly..." He joked. I jerked his arm down a bit, and he laughed.
"What about your house? Where do you live?" His face immediately fell.
"No, you don't want to go there." He said quickly, shaking his head.
"Justin, please! If it's closer can't we just go there to rest up and get a drink?" I was really thirsty from running around in the sun, and I looked up at him pleadingly. He looked kind of panicked, like he was having some kind of internal battle.
"We can go there for ten minutes, if you promise to never tell anyone you've been to my house. Don't even tell anyone where I live." He was staring deep into my eyes the whole time he spoke, and he sounded pretty worried. I nodded in agreement.
"I promise. Not even Lottie. Where do you live?"

"Down there, behind those trees" He said, pointing down the hill towards the school and the park.
"Are you sure?" I asked, confused. "I've never seen any houses around there..."
"I know where I live, April!" He snapped, before putting his arm around my waist, pulling my arm around his neck, and helping me hop down the hill a bit.

"Can you go any faster?" He asked. He looked like he was in a rush for whatever reason.
"No, Justin! I've hurt my ankle, haven't I?" I felt like crying. I wished I'd never asked to go to his house. He was so sweet until I suggested it, and I was starting to worry about what was at his house by this point.
"April." He sighed, before he stopped and bent over infront of me. "Jump on."
I just stared at his back a minute, before climbing on as he'd asked.

He took a minute to rearrage my legs before starting to walk quickly down the hill.
"Justin, you can put me down if you want?" I offered once we reached the main road again.
"No, you don't weigh anything anyway." I'm not sure I believe him. I must weigh about the same as him, he's just strong obviously.

He took us down the streets leading to the school, before ducking into an alley by the park, and walking through a thick row of trees.

He put me down when we reached the other side.
"I didn't even know this was here..." I said stupidly, looking around. There were three trailers in this top bit, and I could see a couple more down the hill behind the others. There was litter and broken things everywhere, right in the entranceway was a pile of something that looked like it had been burnt before it was abandoned three feet from the bins. I could hear a dog barking nearby, but I couldn't see it, and there was a radio on loud in one of the trailers. It didn't look like the kind of place people choose to live, especially not if they have children.
"This way." Justin said, leading me down the slope towards the steps to the big cabin in front, I tried putting a little weight on my foot as we walked. It still hurt, but I realised Justin was right about it not being broken.

We reached the front door, and he took in a deep breath, and let it out before opening it.

He stepped just inside the door, and I looked over his shoulder. There was last nights pizza box still sat on the table, with dirty glasses and empty bottles over the table and the counters behind. The once-white paint was starting to peel off the counters and appliances, revealing the rusting metal underneath.
"Fuck sake." Justin whispered under his breath, before stepping properly in, pulling me behind him, and closing the door.

The room stank of stale smoke, grease, and mould. There was a purple-haired woman on the couch, who I assumed to be Justin's mum, although she looked young enough to be his sister. She lay there, staring blankly at the ceiling, surrounded by empty glass bottles, cigarette packets and old take-away wrappers. Her skirt was even shorter than anything my cousin Amelia would wear, and she gets told off for dressing like that all the time. The TV was on quietly, and she was whisper-singing along to a rock song.
"Where's your gaville, your jury, what's my offence this time? You're not a judge but if you're gunna judge me, then sentance me to another..."
"Mum." Justin said, and finally she turned her head and noticed us there.
"Oh, hey baby! Did you have fun?" Her speech was slurred, her voice hoarse as if she'd been screaming all morning, her eyes kept rolling in her head, her jaw was chewing, but I couldn't see any gum, and she looked like she was about to throw up.
"You said you were going to bed." Justin looked angry at her.
"Yeah, I think I did say that... I guess I got caught up." Justin moved closer to her, picking up a bottle of pills from the table and giving it a gentle shake, before turning to me.
"April, my bedroom is behind you. I'll be there in a minute." I nodded, and started walking towards the room behind me. "You know I can't get your prescription again until next week." I heard him scold his mum.

I closed the door behind me, but the walls weren't very thick.
"I know that, baby. Just chill out, I know a guy, don't worry."
"Mum," I heard Justin shout." "You wonder why I never bring anyone over? Do you even know how embarrassing you are? How much of a state you look? Look around you! You need to wake up before it's too late." I heard something hit the wall, I assume it was Justin throwing the pill bottle, before he burst through the door, slamming it behind him.

He jumped onto his bed, before tapping the mattress beside him, indicating for me to join him. I sat next to him, massaging my ankle. He didn't say anything, so I looked around his room. It was small, even smaller than mine, with fresh cream paint covering the walls. He had nothing in there besides his bed and a rather dirty-looking rug. There were a few posters on his walls of some band I'd never heard of. 'K-Infinity' or something. They looked like the kind of band Amelia might listen to.
"Sorry about her." Justin muttered after a few minutes.
"It's ok." I had no idea what to say, but I knew it wasn't ok. "What's wrong with her?" I was sure I already knew.
"She's drunk. Or high. Or both. She always is these days." He sighed, and leaned back, stretching his legs out infront of him. "That's why I don't want you to tell anyone you've been here."

"I understand." I lied. Well, I understand why he doesn't want anyone to know, but I don't understand how someone like her can still have their kid around. I don't know anything about drugs really, but I know from TV and movies that you need money for that kind of life, and I don't think she has a job, but I didn't want to ask.
"Is your leg better now? I want to get out of here." I looked up and he was looking at me. He had this desperate look in his eye. I rubbed my ankle while I tried to think of something we could do now.

We heard a smash from the other room, followed by Justin's mum laughing. Justin jumped off the bed and pulled my arm.
"Come on. You're too young for this, I'll carry you." I had no idea what he meant by too young, because we're the same age, so that made no sense, but he did carry me to the park, and we stayed there for most of the rest of the day. We didn't even mention his house or his mum, which he seemed thankful for.

Now I'm really worried, though. Clearly his mum can't take care of him, she didn't even ask who I was and I could have been a criminal or something! My mum always asks who people are when I bring them in, and she would never let our house get into that state. I wish I could ask someone what to do, but I know Justin would probably never speak to me again if I did.

Justins Mum was singing Ignorance, by Paramore, if anyone was wondering.
The band K-Infinity is from one of Valpre's stories, Krisis.
To avoid confusion, I feel I should point out that this is two days of diary entries in one. The last chapter was too short, and if I split this in two the problem would repeat itself. :)

This is her, for anyone who wanted to see. She purty! 
I might do a 'meet these characters' bonus chapter for her and Justin. There's a lot of backstory there, so I'm now taking votes.


  1. I had a feeling Justin's Mom might have addiction issues, My dad was an alcoholic and cocaine addict, and I totally get where Justin is coming from. It's totally embarrassing to have your friends see that.
    I'd be interested ina background chapter on Justin and his mom. =D

    He's really sweet to April, and he's lucky she's as understanding as she is. Crazy addicted parents can really isolate a kid, because of the embarrassment of bringing anyone home, but also because they end up having to take responsibility for stuff in the house.

    Poor Justin. *hugs*

    Oh, and I feel bad for April, too. It's hard to have your dad move to another town like that.

    1. :( *hugs*
      Sorry if this hit a nerve then! I hope I can do this storyline justice, you'll have to let me know. I don't have any experiance of addiction from childhood, my first taste was when I was 15 and one of my closest friends died from an overdose. Since then it seems like everyone I know is addicted to something (Except me, the good girl), so I feel I have the experiance to describe someone off their face on whatever substance, just not the emotions of a child in Justins situation.

      Yes, he's really sweet to April (More on that in the bonus chapter. Thinking I can use it as a way to show his thoughts on recent events in his life, as we only get what April sees his emotions as, and he has a good mask usually). I'm not sure at the moment whether she's understanding, or just innocent. She has absolutely no experiance of this, as most of the town's population is made up of hardworking businessmen, or farmers and farm workers, none of those wild-crazy-city-folk like Justin and his mother.
      Yes, we saw here that Justin is both embarrassed of his mother and bringing people back to the house, and he takes some responsibility for household things (obviously not the cleaning...) like picking up his mums prescription, and we already saw him shopping for groceries.

      Yes, poor Justin!
      Pahaa! Yeah, she does get a little overlooked by Justins revelations, doesn't she? Well, at least after meetin Justins mum and seeing how he lives, she'll probably feel a little better about her dad leaving because 'it could be worse'.
      My parents moved to another town, so I have experiance of that (never mind that it was under a year ago and I was 21, I still need my mummy! :p)

      Thank you for reading! :)

  2. Somehow, I saw this coming :-(. I don't find Justin creepy any more, poor thing! He's coping with the situation to the best of his abilities, and considering his young age, doing a great job at it. It tore my heart out when he told April she was just too young for that, meaning that he feels "older" than he should, so sad :-(.

    And this will probably help April put into perspective some things in her own life, like her father leaving town, which is also very sad, by the way.

    But to end on a lighter note, "How do you know? Maybe I'm really good with pain?" ----> I loved that line LOL.

    A backstory on these two charactes sounds interesting.

    PS: *hugs* to both you and Yangthecat. Your personal stories have touched me.

    1. No, Justin did seem a little creepy before, but now we know all the reasons behind his behaviour, its just sad. Yes, he is coping well, and he does feel a lot older than his years, and wants to protect April because she's so innocent compared to everyone else he's met.

      It definately will, although she should still be upset over the things happening to her, it's not healthy to bottle your own feelings up just because someone else has it worse.

      Haha! That's the kind of thing I say all the time, and I'm 10 years older than her :p I always exaggerate like that. I had something in my eye the other day, and I announced that I had broken my eye. That one didn't work well...

      I think I'll do the backstory. There's stuff I can put in there that April may never find out, but might help you, the readers, to connect to the characters more.

      *hugs back* thank you :)

  3. Aww I'm sad for April having her dad move away. He didn't see her much as it was and now with him moving I fear he'll see her even less. I hope he does stay in touch with her.

    Aww again for Justin. :( Now we know what the mystery is surrounding his family and why he's so 'grown' when he's talking to April. Poor kid has to be the adult in the family after seeing the state of his mother. I would love to learn about their back story and how she and Justin ended up where they are.

    April is in a tough spot now, she wants to help her friend because she knows something isn't right at home, but at the same time she doesn't want him to hate her. :(

    1. Yes, she will see him less, but the up side is that she'll be able to go and visit for a weekend, and spend the whole weekend with him. This happened with my grandparents. They lived about 20 minutes drive away, and we hardly ever saw them. They they moved 4 hours away and we went over once a month for a weekend. :p I guess we'll have to see how it works out, and how her parents split the custody.

      Yes, his mother isn't much of a carer. He has to do a lot of the adults jobs around the house, and when school starts up again that could become an issue. He is a lot more mature than April, he wants to protect her innocence, which is why he got her out of that house so quickly.

      Yes, exactly. She either has to betray his trust (which she only just earnt), or let him keep living like he is. Tough choice :(

      Thanks for reading! :D

  4. I fear this is only the beginning of April's dad leaving her life almost permanently. Christmas may come, and he'll try to tell her how much better a job he has yada yada yada.
    Daddy ain't coming home, sweet pea. :(

    Like just about everyone, I too figured Justin's mom had an addicion or several. I find it ironic how he told April ''you're too young for this''. He's older than his years, and I fear growing up with a chip on his shoulder.
    I did find it incredibly cute how he started tag. :-)

    1. I suppose it could well be. He certainly isn't intending it to be the end of their relationship, but things don't always work out how we'd like.
      At the moment, he's hoping it will all work out how it is in his head, so isn't planning on having to convince her that he's better off in Bridgeport. I guess we'll have to wait til December to find out, though. :(

      Yeah, I had wondered if anyone would work it out, and look at you all! All so clever, can't hide anything ;)
      Yes, he's a lot more mature than here just because of all the stuff he's had to do. Until recently, April had pretty much been sheltered from everything by her parents, since they've now split up we'll have to see what happens now.
      I did too :) Aww! He still has moments where he can forget it all and be a child, and that was one of those moments :D

      Thanks for reading! (')>

    2. Oh wow, ducks are super-deformed in this font :|

  5. Ahhh... Poor little guy, having to grow up too fast.
    He has had some positive influence though or he wouldn't be able to care for a mother like that, as a child no less... and he has great taste in music ^_^

    I hope sort of that April can respect his wish to not say anything, on the other hand, I wish she would... what a tough place for her. I agree with Justin, she's too young by being innocent.

    1. Yeah :(
      Hm. It hasn't always been as hard as it is now, but he's not had a huge amount of positive influence.
      yeah, he has great music taste ;)

      Yeah, she wants to keep his secret and be a good friend, but she also wants to get him help. Tough choice.


Thank you for reading! Now let me know what you think. Any tips on what I could improve on? Anything you particularly liked? Or maybe you just want to comment, I'll read it and reply whatever you write :)